discomfort

being here, I've felt very uncomfortable. uncomfortable in many ways. in moving, in being away from those i love, my short hair, art, my skin, my location, constantly meeting new people, my clothes, not feeling in touch with the natural, my self, old ideals. i can't think of any consistent period that i have felt comfortable here. but no matter how much i cry out to be surrounded by trees everyday, hate my haircut, wish i was sharing a house with my dear mother again, or feel like i packed for this trip blind, it is all exactly how it was supposed to happen. all of this discomfort i'm feeling is going towards an important cause. making me a better me. in all the discomfort, i feel a sense of peace. because discomfort is intrinsic. and i don't think i'll ever be done improving.

i've been struggling with putting words to this jumble of emotions, so when i found them i thought it was time to share. 

i've also been overwhelmed by all of the things i've had to do or keep up with here. 

school, friends here, friends there, sight-seeing, eating well, planning, organizing, traveling, enrolling in summer classes, staying sane, playing the ukulele, trying not to think ahead too much, taking photos, editing photos, catching the bus, applying for summer jobs, looking at the stars, taking care of my skin, saving money, watching good movies, improving my  self. 

this is why i've been struggling to keep up with this blog. at least for now, this is the only place i publish photos from my adventures, and sharing and telling stories with my photographs is vital for me, so i'll not give up, but you must be patient with me! i am currently working on my second essay of the week, a long one by my standards, and i hope to get a good portion of it completed today. 

so, blog about my wonderful trip to wales, coming soon. 

wish me luck. oh, and happy-soon-to-be st. patty's day. celebrate at a good pub! 

(especially you, mom and mike)